Life in Australia

Tip number one for all Singaporeans or other Asians or anyone else who happens to be residing in Australia temporarily or for good.

If you get spat on twice and thrice on a bus or in any public space.
Remember rule number one.

Go for the head with your hardest punch on one of the weaker guys, especially the one who looks the most irritating. Now I know some other advice out there is to go for the biggest fellow, thing is unless you can confidently do so, it's better to take the weaker one out of the game first.

Then quickly aim at the nose or the softer parts of the facial structure of the other morons who picked on you. It quickly gives them something to think about.

I didn't follow the second rule, so yeah I am telling you who is reading this to do it so you won't be thinking about it two days later on why didn't you land a few more hits.

Now, it is expected that you will have to take some hits, so, just grit the teeth tightly, prevents the lips from being cut by your own teeth. Throw down any specs immediately when the physical altercation starts, saves you money, trust me.

And oh, most likely the morons who picked on you are stupid street kids who when grouped together have a combined IQ of an extinct dinosaur, so don't hesitate in even going for the smallest one. Need me to remind any of you to watch Jurassic Park again? You know, those evil little raptors. ...then again the raptors in the movie are probably even more intelligent than the stupid moron street kids.

Please do not even entertain the thought of negotiating or backing off, unless of course, you have decided to play the stupid dumb asian (or insert other ethnic group) act, which only serves to increase your potential pain.


Life is unfair, so don't expect to go crying to the authorities which by then is too late for you to do anything other than to shake your fists angrily in the air cursing the gods.

And oh, this tip applies mainly for the males, wouldn't really advice females to do it unless, well, they have some sort of vigorous trainning before...no no, TaeBo Boxing in the gymn doesn't count. And I do hope all of you pay your insurance dues religiously.

That is all.

Amen.
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